If 40 is the new 20, then 50 must be the new 30 and for sexually active women, this is excellent news. According to recent figures, there are a number of stats and facts pointing toward more satisfaction and participation from both men and women as we continue to age. For example, women in their 70s are experiencing more gratifying sex compared to younger gals in their 40s. Inside these other older age groups, there's more revealing information when you consider:
- Roughly 40% of people aged 65 to 80 are still sexually active
- For those in a romantic relationship inside the same age range, this number rose to 54% of people still enjoying sexual intimacy
A study by the National Commission on Aging (NCOA) found that women over the age of 70 reported sex was also more physically gratifying than in their 40s. Sex with this older crowd was also shown to be more emotionally satisfying for both genders. Check out these nine tips, including more eye-opening stats and facts about sex for more seasoned females:
1. Trouble in Paradise
While it's fairly common for men to experience ED (aka erectile dysfunction) as they continue to age, there are a plethora of little blue pills available for men to overcome this problem. However, for older women, sexual issues can be more problematic. Examples include female incontinence that may cause urine leakage during orgasm as well as the walls of the vagina becoming thinner and stiffer. Women may also experience less lubrication which can make sex painful and uncomfortable.
While less wetness downstairs is a real drag for women regardless of their age, using a lubricant is often a simple solution to this lack of moisture. However, if women experience any type of problem when it comes to enjoying sex, they should always consult their physician. Statistics also show that for those who have concerns about their sex lives, only a relatively small number of women admit to speaking to a doctor about these problems.
2. Opening a Dialogue
Especially for women who are experiencing pain during intercourse, there could be a serious issue at play like endometriosis or another problem requiring medical attention. Sex is an important and pleasurable part of our lives so we shouldn't be wary about opening up a dialogue with our doctor when there's something askew.
Discussing what's going on during intercourse shouldn't be a hush-hush, only discussed behind closed bedroom doors type of experience. We should be talking about, exploring and discovering everything that's wonderful about having sex. Check out this online guide that explores many topics from how to openly talk about this touchy subject to elevating pleasure to new heights.
3. Older Women Dating Younger Men
For fans following celebrity couples, many of us were taken aback when Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher called it quits after being together for a decade, meeting in 2003, got hitched in 2005 and ditching their relationship in 2013. While Moore was in her early forties and Kutcher a twenty-something when they met, both were in their sexual prime despite their sixteen-year age difference. While we're accustomed to seeing older men with younger women, does this age gap make a difference for more seasoned women?
Studies have shown women who wed men who are seven to nine years their junior have a 20% higher mortality risk compared to those who marry men closer to their own age. Over 60% of older women surveyed seeking younger male companionship said they are looking for a serious relationship, however other responses included:
- 16% are looking for "no-strings fun with one partner"
- 13% are seeking exclusive, short-term relationships
- 10% are happy with "no-strings fun with several partners"
As long as no one's getting hurt and these partners are practicing safe sex, what's the harm in these pairs hooking up and having some fun in-between the sheets? Given the statistics shared above, perhaps these types of differently aged couples are betting off not getting married and simply enjoying their sexual relationship together.
4. Avoiding Less by Doing it More
Another concern many older women commonly face is a condition known as vaginal atrophy when the tissue of this organ begins to shink or thin following menopause due to a decrease of estrogen. In order to maintain function, medical experts recommend continued intercourse and the use of lubricants as mentioned previously.
Also when addressing the issue of vaginal dryness, allow for plenty of arousal time which means more foreplay. Speaking of more, it's also recommended partners experiment with different sexual positions or taking a warm bath to relax muscles prior to intimacy. So it would seem following doctor's orders includes having more sex and spending additional intimate time with your partner.
5. More Medical Advice
Along with the use of lubricants, a doctor may recommend medications like vaginal estrogen for postmenopausal women if moisturizers aren't doing the job. If estrogen treatment isn't helping, there are other medications to consider to aid with discomfort for some women experiencing uncomfortable intercourse.
Lower libido is another issue people of both genders may experience as they continue to grow older. Physicians may review medications you're currently taking, make adjustments to dosages, or change the drugs you're taking to combat this problem. Getting enough sleep, avoiding excessive alcohol intake and participating in increased physical activity are also great natural libido boosters. These tactics will potentially lead to more energy and increased levels of confidence that will boost your pleasure in the bedroom.
6. Creativity and Communication
We've established how important it is to communicate with our doctors about any problems we're having with intercourse, but it's also vital we talk to our partner about sex. It's more than likes and dislikes, turn-ons and turn-offs. We also need to open up about trying new things, different positions and even various locations for getting intimate.
While the majority of us have been led to believe men become bored with monogamy and "doing it" the same old way time after time, again, the truth is most women feel exactly the same way. For argument's sake and since excellent food is often compared to great sex, let's say your favorite food is pasta and you're especially fond of spaghetti with red sauce. If you had nothing but spaghetti at each meal every day for a year, after just a few days, weeks or months, the mere sight of this dish would be a real turn-off. You'd probably start missing your other favorite meals and the same can be said for sex.
7. Change the Recipe
For continued comparison's sake, the term pasta encompasses many different types of dishes in the wide variety of ways it can be prepared, served and enjoyed. It's easy enough to partake in noodles (sex) without any sauce (intercourse) by consuming them with butter and parmesan cheese (having oral sex and cuddling) for example. There's also lasagna to consider. It almost tastes like a completely different dish involving layers of different foods and cheeses with or without meat. The possibilities are almost endless much the same as changing things up when we're in the sack. Don't get trapped into giving or receiving that same old sad, tired routine or "eating the same dish" over and over again.
8. Changing Positions and Expectations
Keeping up with the food comparisons, tacos are another favorite food choice. Traditionally, tacos are prepared with the meat put into the shell first to prevent the shell from breaking at the bottom. The top of tacos are typically lettuce, cheese and tomatoes and although it can be messy, it still tastes fantastic.
When I was a kid, the first time I had tacos my mother prepared all the ingredients and gave us children the option of how we would construct them for our own individual consumption. Not knowing any better, I thought the best way was to put the lettuce in first followed by tomatoes and cheese topped with the warm meat. This way, the hot, meat sauce/juice melts the cheese and it eventually drips down over the lettuce and tomatoes. How's that for a sexual reference?
In any event, I still prepare, serve, share and enjoy "backward tacos" to this day. Approaching sex from different, less-traditional positions and presentations should be attempted at the very least. You might love it, hate it or not notice any difference, but it's still worth a try. We should all do what we can to keep our sex drives alive and well, interesting, and variable as we continue to age.
9. You've Come a Long Way Baby
Many older women recall the 1970s slogan of Virginia Slims cigarettes who touted, "You've come a long way baby," when it came to equal rights and the way some females smoked a different, much slimmer brand of smokes. When it comes to sex toys, they've also advanced a great deal over time since their humble beginnings thousands of years ago when vibrators were made of leather or wood.
Some of today's more modern vibrators are designed to please both men and women simultaneously with some coming complete with an app for more satisfaction. They're getting so advanced it's surprising to see they don't make the bed the next day! In closing, although we've come a long way, we still have a lot of miles left including enjoying a long, happy and healthy sex life. Remember to reach out to your physician for any health-related issues or contact us with any questions you may have about enhancing your sexual experiences.