Sex drive naturally goes up and down, but when it stays low for too long, it can start to negatively affect confidence, relationships, and overall wellbeing. And the paradox is that low desire can be linked to everything from stress and relationship issues to diet, sleep, and hormone changes. So, what causes low libido in men, and what can you actually do about it?
Here is what sex experts, relationship therapists, nutritionists, and scientists say about low libido, what might be behind it, and how you can increase your sex drive in healthy ways.
What causes low libido in men?
Before starting to find ways in which to improve your libido it is important to highlight the potential cause of the reduced sex drive.
Daniel Sher from Between Us Clinic explains;
“The key is to work out what is causing the loss of libido because this will determine the best treatment. Often, finding ways to de-stress, manage any symptoms of anxiety or depression, and fostering true intimacy and conflict-resolution within your relationship will do a world of good.”
Hormone changes
Testosterone is an important male hormone responsible for boosting your sex drive. It’s mostly produced in the testicles, with the rest produced in the adrenal glands above the kidneys. Studies have shown that when testosterone levels suddenly decrease, so does your desire for sex; these low testosterone levels can affect everything from libido to muscle mass.
In most men, testosterone levels are at their highest around puberty and begin to decline around the age of 40. Sports medicine exercise physiologist, Dr. Fiona Gilbert explains:
“After the age of 35, most men notice a decline in libido. This is mainly because the function of testosterone regulation transfers more to the adrenals rather than the testis, and with our modern life, our adrenals are already under a lot of stress.”
Yet, testosterone isn’t the only factor to affect sex drive and performance, so don’t worry if this isn’t the answer to your low libido.
Unhealthy lifestyle
Health plays a huge part in a man’s sex drive. If you aren’t suffering from testosterone deficiency, it may be a medical condition such as an endocrine disorder, diabetes, sleep apnea, or high blood pressure, all of which you should talk to your doctor about.
However, there might be simpler reasons for lower libido in men, such as alcohol, poor diet, lack of sleep, or not enough exercise.
Nutritionist Justin Nault from Clovis Nutrition states these three things negatively impact your hormones and sex drive:
- Sugar: Both fructose and glucose (the most common forms of sugar in the diet) are natural enemies of testosterone!
- Grains: This does not just include “gluten.” You can thank the Lectins, mostly. Cut them out your diet and see the effects in no time!
- Lack of sleep: Your body creates testosterone from cholesterol while you sleep. Studies have shown that you can double your morning testosterone levels simply by getting more sleep! You'd better go catch your forty winks for your sexual well-being.
Mental health issues
Chronic stress can lead to the production of too much cortisol, this in turn can lower your libido. Not to mention, the brain is often referred to as the biggest sex organ. Preoccupying it with worries of money, time, and responsibilities can make it harder for you to feel sexual, be aroused, and climax.
Meditation and mindfulness sex can help improve your low libido. It is easier said than done to relax your mind, and ‘de-stress’ yourself but by making a little time for yourself to unwind and focus on your mental wellness you can dramatically improve your sex drive. Mindfulness has been found to improve low desire and other sexual dysfunctions, which is why apps such as Headspace can be an important part of your journey to not only reduce stress but also increase your libido.
Many people suffering from anxiety or depression have to weigh up the costs of these sexual side effects and their mental health. Taking antidepressants increases your levels of the “happy” hormone serotonin, but can cause a drop in the “lust” hormone dopamine. If you are taking antidepressants, here are some tips on how to boost your sex drive.
Social stigma
In society, men are under a lot of pressure to be perceived as masculine and to have a high sex drive. Dr. Sarah Hunter Murray says this means that:
“Men don’t always want to admit that they have less than a high and constant interest in sex, because, unfortunately, there is still a stigma that this could make them seem less "manly.” As a result, it is difficult to know how many men are actually coming forward and discussing their low sexual desire, and whether their voices are being adequately captured in research or in therapy.”
Stigmas like that can cause a negative feedback loop of low libido, particularly if someone has experienced erectile dysfunction (ED), which could lead to a lack of sexual motivation and decreased libido.
How to increase sex drive in men with low libido
1. Try Supplements
For those experiencing low testosterone, there are testosterone boosters out there. However, Health and Wellness Expert, Caleb Backe from Maple Holistics, says to be aware of these side effects:
“Like many steroids and human growth hormones, testosterone boosters can lead to enlarged breasts, shrunken testicles, skin problems, and even sleep apnea.”
When it comes to their actual effectiveness, science says that many of these testosterone boosters work. The tricky part is finding the right one.
Backe says one of the most widely-studied testosterone boosters is D-Aspartic Acid (D-AA), which has proven to boost testosterone levels by nearly 50%. This natural testosterone supplement essentially acts as a trigger to produce more of the hormone. Even after just a few days, you are likely to experience increased stamina, libido, and even muscle mass.
2. Engage in sexual activity
Yes, it sounds like a paradox to have sex or be sexually active when your libido is low, but it’s actually a great feedback loop. The more you engage sexually, the more your body and brain respond with arousal signals that can help reignite desire over time. Even solo activity counts - masturbation increases blood flow, stimulates arousal pathways, and can improve erection strength, all of which support a healthier sex drive. Studies have shown that masturbation counteracts the daily dip in free testosterone throughout the day, suggesting it may help keep your arousal, and libido, more steady.
If you’re struggling to get started, using a doctor-recommended male vibrator like Tenuto 2 can make the process more enjoyable and effective. Tenuto 2 is clinically proven to combat ED, improve ED-related performance anxiety, and generally heightens arousal, sensation, and helps bring back excitement even when libido is low.
3. Experiment with Viagra
The instinct when dealing with a low libido may be to buy over the counter phosphodiesterase (PDE) inhibitors such as Viagra, Cialis, or Levitra. Yet these are not a long term solution and will often do more damage, as your body will not be able to self-regulate. Remember, Viagra does not solve low libido, it only works to get you hard and keep you hard, not improve that sex drive.
Dr. Roisin McHugh, says to be very cautious when taking Viagra, particularly if combining it with the muscle relaxant, alkyl nitrites, commonly known as poppers:
“The combination will cause a drop in blood pressure, this can be a significant drop in the blood pressure that can lead to collapse and death. By far the most common side effect is a pounding headache. The combination of poppers and Viagra can also produce sickness or dizziness, or even fainting.”
4. Slow foreplay down
If drugs aren’t the answer, your lifestyle is pretty healthy and happy, but your libido still isn’t as high as you’d like, why not just take it slow? It is common for men and women to lose interest in sex from time to time, and important not to expect your sex drive to match anyone else’s.
Dr. Praus further explains that if you have a lower libido, longer periods of stimulation can help - foreplay isn’t just for women. That includes non-demanding levels of sexual interaction to build him up to that point. By slowing things down, and exploring your body alone or with a partner.
Takeaway
Low libido can be influenced by many factors, from stress and sleep to diet and relationship dynamics. The important thing to remember is that sex drive can change - and with the right steps, it can be improved. Staying sexually active, looking after your health, and addressing underlying causes all help bring desire back.
For men who want extra support, Tenuto 2 is designed to improve erection strength, enhance arousal, and make intimacy more exciting. Whether you’re reconnecting with a partner or jumpstarting your own arousal, it’s a reliable way to keep your sex life active, which in turn supports your libido.
