You may be wondering why on earth would watching my partner have sex with someone else empower my relationship? But going to a sex party isn’t all sex (unless of course, you want it to be). With parties to cater to all tastes, desires, and kinks they all have zero requirements to have sex with other people. However, they can provide insight into a different world, help you communicate with your partner, and foster a safe environment to explore yourselves.
From Killing Kittens to Torture Garden to SDC swinger parties there is something to suit all tastes and desires. With some sex dungeons and others luxuriously brimming with champagne and beautiful lingerie, there are sex parties to suit every person. Expanding your sexual horizons never looked so glamorous. Research suggests up to 89% of respondents fantasized about group sex in one way or another, indicating that a large portion of the population is interested in some version of group sex. That could mean your partner might be equally as interested in dipping their toe into this world.
Fantasies don’t need to become a reality but going to a sex party gives you the option without the pressure. It is completely acceptable to attend a party as a voyeur, and a lot of people go just to be watched or watch! Do as much or as little as you want at sex clubs.
Plenty of people go as voyeurs, out of curiosity or to broaden their hedonistic desires. Parties are pretty great for people who are just looking to explore in their own time and with consent being a paramount principle of the kink community, there is no pressure to do anything.
Should I Go To A Sex Party?
Weigh it up. What are your reasons behind the desire? Are you doing it for you, or your partner? Is it to explore your sexuality, or for the bucket list? How secure are you in yourself, or your friendships and relationships? Whatever you choose, communication with your partner is key as well as enjoying yourself (and always get consent)!
As with anything in the bedroom and life, this is not a one size fits all situation. Some long-term relationships don’t want to explore group sex due to various reasons, and that’s ok. For others, a sex party could bring a whole new lease of life to your relationship allowing you to explore yourselves in a safe environment.
Communication is key
Going to a sex party won’t fix your relationship and if you are having problems it might just make them worse. Before going to a sex party, make sure you have an open and honest discussion with your partner. Discuss your feelings, worries, thoughts, and lay everything out on the table before you go.
Make sure you discuss what boundaries you have - are you going just to look and be seen? Are you open to having sex whilst you’re there? Can you play with other people? Getting on the same page beforehand on where your boundaries and limits lie will help make the experience a great one - and you can always chop and change things whilst you’re there. Some partners pre-agree on a code word or signal (like touching your ear/nose) for when they feel uncomfortable or to communicate other things without speaking whilst they are there. Either way, make sure you openly communicate with your partner to ensure a great night.
How Can A Sex Party Empower Your Relationship
The following are just a few ways a sex party could empower you and your relationship. You don’t have to be a sexual maverick to attend - these places are filled with like-minded, sex-positive people from all walks of life.
Explore something new together
As fun as a twosome can be, trying new things with your partner helps expand your sexual repertoire and bring excitement into your relationship. Exploring your fantasies and desires as a couple is a great marker of a healthy relationship, as you grow and learn together. It all begins with talking about your desires, this might be something you have both wanted to try for some time but have been too shy to talk about.
Not to mention the hit of dopamine that occurs when you are with someone new sexually - this is crucial for lust and libido, so reignite that spark by participating in something new together. Trying new sex positions and sex toys are also great ways to add something different into the bedroom, helping you become closer than ever.
Meet like-minded people
As adults in relationships, friendship circles can run small. With old friends and work friends making up a large portion of your social life, attending a sex party is a great way to meet new people. Broaden your network by meeting some like-minded sex-positive people - you are sure to find couples and singles that you connect with whether that happens to be romantically or platonically. Finding friendship is an often unspoken part of sex parties.
One Killing Kitten party goer told Cosmopolitan: “I have made some true friendships with a few of the girls I have met along the way."
Reignite sexual desire
The novelty of being with other people can spread into your home life helping it feel fresh and giving your sex life the little boost it needs. Perhaps you’ve been with your partner for a long time and the spark isn’t as strong as it used to be. Watching your partner with someone else can make you see each other in a whole new light and reignite a passion that you haven’t felt since the honeymoon period.
Satisfy your sexual appetite
Many people go through their whole life not experimenting with their sexuality. If you and your partner were childhood sweethearts, you might not have had the opportunity to explore your sexuality fully. Sex parties allow you to explore different aspects of sexuality eased in with the familiar and with fewer stigmas attached. If you do have bisexual tendencies, you can experience the best of both worlds, simultaneously! Whilst letting your partner in your fantasy.
Feel sexually empowered
Being sex-positive doesn’t mean you have lots of sex, and going to a sex party doesn’t mean having lots of sex. Donning some sexy lingerie, getting all dressed up, and feeling great about yourself is a great way to cultivate positive feelings about yourself. Special occasions It can be difficult to feel sexy in the day-to-day world and attending a sex party just like going to a nice dinner is a great excuse to get dressed up and feel good!
Learn new tricks
Even if you end up just watching others, you may learn something new you’d like to incorporate with your partner. Seeing how other couples play together and interact might give you some new ideas for your own sex life and widen your sexual repertoire. It’s almost like getting a live sex education!
No obligation to do anything
Remember, there is never an expectation to have sex. Lots of people go and keep their clothes on. If you are kink-curious, want to have a fun night out, or are just interested in surrounding yourself with like-minded people then try a sex party as a reason to get dressed up and spend time together - in a place where judgemental stares are left at the door.
Sex parties are a great and safe way to explore yourself sexually, without putting pressure on yourself or your partner. Attending a sex party could be eye-opening in the best way!
