No, we’re not talking about car detailing. Rimming might be the butt of some jokes and whispers, but seriously, what exactly is it and why do people love it?
Rimming, also called analingus, is mouth-to-anus stimulation of the rim and nearby skin. You can use your tongue, mouth, and lips to tease the anus and surrounding areas like the perineum and butt cheeks. It doesn’t have to lead to penetration or anal sex. People of all genders and orientations can enjoy it, so shake off myths that label it as only for one group.
Now, if you’re curious, we’ll break down everything you’ve secretly wondered, without adding it to your search history, plus ways to make this intimate adventure extra pleasurable.
Why do people enjoy rimming?
It’s not just the taboo that makes rimming a turn-on. The anus is loaded with thousands of nerve endings, plus nearby erogenous zones like the perineum and buttocks. Stimulating these areas with a mouth or tongue can send a rush of incredible sensations you didn’t know were possible.
An added benefit, if you’re thinking about venturing into anal play, such as prostate massage or anal sex, rimming can serve as foreplay, helping your sphincter relax and make the rest of the experience a whole lot more inviting.
Tips for the best rimming experience
1. Talk it out
Rimming can still feel taboo for some, so start with an open conversation about curiosity, boundaries, and preparation. Discuss whether you want to use a barrier like a dental dam, shower first, or add toys or lube. Mutual consent is non-negotiable, and it also sets the stage for trust and relaxation - both essential for enjoying this type of play.
2. Try it out yourself
You can’t rim yourself (unless you’re a cirque level contortionist), but you can explore the sensations with your hands. Try massaging around the rim with a fingertip or the padded side of your knuckle for a firmer, broader pressure. Notice how light touches, gentle presses, or circular motions feel. This can help you better describe to a partner what you like and where.
3. Add lube - or flavored lube
Flavored lube can make giving more appealing for the rimmer, though it’s not required. Use a small amount on the outside of the anus. Choose a water-based formula so it won’t damage latex or polyurethane dental dams, and avoid anything with sugar or glycerin if you plan to switch to vaginal play later.
4. Find the right position
The best position is definitely up for debate, but one would say it’s one that gives the giver clear access and the receiver comfort. Try:
- Modified doggy style, with a pillow under the hips for lift.
- On your back, knees pulled toward your chest, feet resting on your partner’s shoulders.
- Lying on your stomach with hips slightly raised, for a more relaxed, less exposed feel. Use your hands to gently spread the cheeks or lift the hips so the area is easier to reach.
5. Build anticipation
Treat rimming as part of a larger journey. Start with kisses or light touches on the thighs, buttocks, and lower back. Use warm breaths over the area before stimulating it. Switch between soft kisses, gentle sucks, and playful nibbles on the cheeks or perineum before moving to the rim itself.
6. Play with technique
The tongue can do a lot more than just lick:
- Long, flat licks for broad, warming strokes.
- Short, firm flicks for concentrated teasing.
- Slow circles around the rim to build anticipation.
- Pointed-tip pressure for a sharper, more intense sensation.
- Alternate between light suction and soft blows of air for contrast.
- Switch pressure levels by moving between feather-light licks that barely graze the skin and firmer, deliberate strokes for more intensity.
- Change the pace with slow, drawn-out movements, then add quick, playful flicks to create exciting peaks.
Pay attention to their breathing, moans, or movements - they’ll tell you which moves to keep using.
7. Mix in gentle squeezes or sensual massages
Use your hands to keep the rest of their body engaged while you rim. Give a sensual massage to the buttocks with slow, kneading pressure, trace circles on the lower back, or lightly drag your fingertips over the thighs. This multi-zone stimulation can amplify the pleasure at the rim by keeping the whole nervous system involved.
8. Layer sensations
Rimming doesn’t have to be a solo act. Pair it with other types of stimulation, like a fingertip circling the perineum or a vibrator massaging the perineum, clitoris, or pair it with other anal sex toys. The combination of oral stimulation and vibration can amplify arousal and intensify every sensation in the best way possible, culminating into a blended orgasm that can feel unbelievable.
9. Mind your breathing
Soft, warm breaths between licks can heighten arousal, especially if you hover close without touching for a few seconds. The sensation of heat followed by wetness can send shivers through your partner’s body. You can even play with timing your breaths to their movements, so the air hits at just the right moment.
Are there any risks to rimming?
Like any sexual activity involving the anus, rimming can carry a small risk of passing certain infections. The anus naturally contains bacteria, so it is worth taking a few simple steps to keep things clean and comfortable. A quick wash with warm water and mild soap or a fragrance-free wipe is usually enough. Practicing basic hygiene will usually be enough to rim without worry. Going further with preparation is more about consideration for your partner’s comfort than strict necessity.
Some sexually transmitted infections, including herpes, chlamydia, and gonorrhea, can be passed through oral-anal contact. If you want to lower that risk, use barrier protection such as a dental dam (a thin sheet of latex or polyurethane placed over the anus) or a tongue condom (a soft sleeve worn over the tongue). Barriers also help if you just prefer a cleaner experience while still feeling the stimulation.
Takeaway
Rimming is one of those intimate activities that can feel both playful and intensely arousing when you lean into it. With open communication and these tips, you can turn it into a highly sensual part of your foreplay or make it the main event. For an even more electrifying experience, try rimming with an award-winning vibrator that stimulates other erogenous zones at the same time for a toe-curling blended orgasm.
